Hello, my name is Josh and I’m addicted to Google Analytics. This is a post to help fellow bloggers identify their addiction. If you answer yes to 3 or less, then you’re safe. If you find yourself agreeing with 3-5, you may want to continue watching for the warning signs of addiction. For those bloggers reading this that can relate to 6-9 of the addictions signs, you should consider admitting yourself in to the G.A.A (Google analytics anonymous). You will find a strong support group to help break free from the bonds of addiction. For those that can relate to all 10 “signs,” you’re obviously a super star blogger with massive site traffic. Can you re-tweet this? PLEASE!
10. Each night you go to bed counting referrals instead of sheep.
9. Before you go to sleep you pray, “Now I lay me down to rest, I pray for visits from the West, as China and India awake, please click my links for heavens sake.”
8. You go into a cold sweat as you enter the weekend still needing 400 page views to pass last weeks numbers.
7. You think about posting an expose on sex addiction including “exclusive” quotes from Tiger Woods and Jesse James.
6. You refresh you stats page 30 seconds after every time you tweet your newest post
5. You secretly tag your posts and images with key words, Brittany Spears, Avatar, Porn, and Justin Bieber
4. The first 30 minutes of every visit to your psychiatrist covers how your value and self worth are not tied to your page views
2. To be trending on Mashable is one of your bucket list items
1. You read that people like to read lists so you put together THIS list in hopes to boost your traffic for the day.